Pneumonia Isn't Funny
by rsh13
Summary: This story is about when Stan gets pneumonia and what he feels about the hospital. And it's in Stan's POV once more. Not slash. Not femslash either. ON HIATUS
1. Hostipalized

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This is just a story that popped into my head. Pretty weird I guess. This is all I could think of. I'm pretty sure I'll make it longer than one chapter. Before I get too carried away, just read. And one more thing it's in Stan's POV. And thanks for commenting on my last story.

/

Wow, this is so boring. And to add onto to that my chest hurts so fucking much. I'm in

the hospital for pneumonia. I hate the damn hospital. I'm a nine year old in the hospital

with pneumonia. It's so damn boring. And it's too damn quiet. How I even got damn

pneumonia I don't fucking know. How the hell did I get it? There's only one good thing

about, I get to skip school. But that's it. It still sucks to be in the damn hospital. It sucks

that is so damn quiet. I hate quiet. I hate the I.V.s in my arms. I'm hooked up to the

machine thingy. Whatever it is. Who knows? I sure don't. No friends, quiet, hospital,

chest pains. Sure is great. No, not at all. It sucks. I can barely get up on my own. You

know why? Because of the damn machine with the fucking I.V.s and the damn

pneumonia. Pneumonia makes me so damn weak. Wendy, Kyle, and Kenny come after

school or whenever possible so I'm not lonely. But I'm lonely right now. They're still in

school. It's only 2:30pm. My parents are at work. Hospitals are boring. I'm gonna have a

bunch of make-up work for school when I get out of the hospital. I have a half an hour

until school's out. I have a half an hour to kill. But what do I do? The hospital's boring. I

start to bite my nails. I haven't done that in while. But I have nothing better to do. So why

not? The damn doctors need to find a cure for pneumonia. If they would have before one

that works faster I wouldn't be in here for fucking pneumonia. I'm too bored. I look at

the clock on the wall. It's only 2:40pm. It's only been ten minutes. Shit, I don't think I

can stay here too much longer. I know how I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die from boredom.

That's it. That's exactly how. I let a cough. It's more hoarse. 2:45pm. Only five minutes

have passed. Damn it. I can't take it any longer. My chest hurts. So fucking much. I can't

take it any more. Fucking pneumonia. I'm in the hospital because of it and it still hurts. I

don't think I can handle any more.

/

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So that's the first chapter. That's the best idea that popped into my head. I hope you liked it. Please tell me if you did.


	2. Friends Are Great

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Here's the second chapter. I hope you liked first the chapter. Also it's still Stan's POV. And thanks for commenting. I'm sorry it took me so long. I had a headache the other day and I had a school activity yesterday. And there's also dumb school during the day. But I got this chapter on here didn't I? Just read.

/

I look at the clock. 3:15. Kyle walks in. "Dude you awake?" He asks. "Yeah dude." I say.

"Dude how you been?" He asks. "Bored and in pain." I answer, "How 'bout you dude?"

"Bored too." He replies. "Well what do you expect you're in school all day." I say. "Oh

yeah Kenny and Wendy said they'll be over after they finish their homework." Kyle says.

"You finished yours didn't you?" I ask. "Yeah dude, of coarse, my best friend's

important." He answers. "Mine too. And if you were ever in the hospital dude I wouldn't

let you be here bored. You'd be extremely bored dude." I say. "Probably dude." He says.

"Dude it is boring." I say. "Yeah, I remember what it's like." Kyle says. Wendy and

Kenny walk in. "Stan?" Wendy asks. "Right here. Where do you think I'm gonna go?" I

ask sarcastically. "I don't know sorry I took so long." Wendy says. "It's alright." I say.

"He's obsessed." I hear Kenny muffle to Kyle. "Hey you'll have someone one day." I

say. "I know who likes who. Other than Stan and Wendy." Kenny muffles and cracks up

laughing. I realize what he means. Kenny means that Kyle and Bebe like each other. I

start laughing. Even though it is my best friend. I think Wendy realizes too because she

starts laughing. It hurts my chest worse to laugh. I try to stop laughing but I just can't.

The only one not laughing is Kyle. He's just blushing. "Kyle you know you like Bebe.

She probably likes you. Dude we all know you two belong together." I say. It is pretty

obvious. "Damn it! It's embarrassing that everyone knows." Kyle says. "We can pretend

we don't know." Kenny muffles, "Maybe you'll forget that we know." I know that's not

gonna make him forget. I know that. Kyle sighs. Now I know I was right. "Kenny, I

won't be able to forget that you guys know." Kyle says. "This might cheer you up a little.

I know she also likes you." Wendy says. "She does?" Kyle asks. "Yes." The rest of us

say. I know it's true. I have a strong feeling that it's true. I'm pretty sure that Kenny's

known for a long time. Wendy might of before Bebe probably told her. One day Kyle and

Bebe will be together. I just know it.

/

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I'm sorry it's pretty short. I just couldn't think of what else to add at the end of this chapter. And I'm also sorry it took me so damn long. But anyway tell me how you like it so far. Please tell me if you do. I'll try updating soon.


	3. Boring Hospital

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Here's the third chapter. Thanks for commenting. And it's still in Stan's POV.

/

2:29am. Why the hell am I up? I hear a kissing noise. Why do the doctors and nurses

always get together at the hospital? Damn it. I don't even feel tired. But I will be bored.

That I'm sure. What am I supposed to do? I close my eyes hoping that I'll fall asleep

soon. Of coarse, I can't. I always have trouble falling back to sleep after waking up. I

close my eyes and leave them shut. I wake up again. This time it's about 10:00am. At

least it's later than before. What day is today? It can't be Monday or Sunday. But is it

Tuesday? Wednesday? Thursday? Friday? Or Saturdays? I'm not even sure. I've been in

the damn hospital for maybe a week. I guess I must have pneumonia pretty bad. I would

probably be dead if it was any worse. I can't die yet. Either can Kyle or Wendy or

Cartman or anyone else that's a kid I know. Only Kenny can die. He always comes back

anyway. No one really cares when he dies. But if he didn't come back there would be a

problem. A nurse walks in. "Do you need anything?" She asks. "Do you know what day

it is?" I ask. "Yes I do. It's Saturday." She replies. "Thanks." I say. "Do you need

anything else?" She asks. "Nah I'm fine." I answer. "Alright." She says and walks out of

the room. So now I know what day it is. I seriously didn't pay attention. But at least it's

me in the hospital instead of one my friends.

/

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Sorry it took me so long to update. But tell me what you think so far.


	4. Great News

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Okay here's the fourth chapter. Alright just read it dude.

/

"Okay Stanley. You're able to go home tonight. I'll go and sign the papers that say you'll

be able to go home." Dr. Liner says. "Great. I'm getting tired of this place." I reply. He

walks out of the door as Mom, Dad, and unfortunately Shelly walk in. "How you feeling

Stan?" Mom asks. "Great. I'm gonna be able to go home tonight." I say. "That's good."

Dad says. "Yeah, now I can beat up the little turd." Shelly says. "Can I stay here so she

doesn't kill me?" I ask. My parents laugh. "I'm being serious." I say. "She's not going to

kill you Stan." Mom says. "Yeah she will. Look at her. She has a evil look." I say

pointing to her. She has a regular smile on. Mom and Dad look at her. "Stan stop playing

games." Dad says. They'll never believe me. Maybe if they walk in when she has her fist

or a knife killing me. Maybe they'll believe then. But then I'll be dead. So I don't think

they'll ever believe me. Until my death when I'm murdered. That's when they'll believe

me. When I'm dead they'll figure out who killed me, my evil sister, Shelly. That's how

I'll probably die.

/

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Sorry it's so short. This isn't the last chapter. I'm gonna add a couple more or so. So don't think this is the last chapter 'cause it's not. Also tell me how you like it so far.


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